You know a Christmas movie has made history when its quotes are recited all year round. And this is exactly what has happened with Home Alone.
The lovable family movie, which made child star Macaulay Culkin a household name, became an instant classic Christmas movie in 1990—and for good reason. Not only is it jam-packed with laughs, tears and lots of hijinks, it also has some of the most memorable Christmas movie quotes. Read on for 31 of our favorite Home Alone quotes of all time. (Full disclosure: A majority of the best lines come from Kevin McCallister, because…let’s be honest, the kid delivered some of the best one-liners ever written.)
Best Home Alone Quotes
1. “Guys, I’m eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!” —Kevin
2. “Keep the change, ya filthy animal.” —Gangster Johnny
3. “Look what you did you little jerk.” —Uncle Frank
4. “Fuller, go easy on the Pepsi.” —Leslie
5. “Buzz, your girlfriend. Woof!” —Kevin
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6. “You’re what the French call, ‘les incompétents'” —Linnie
7. “Kevin, you are such a disease.” —Jeff
8. “There are 15 people in this house and you’re the only one who has to make trouble.” —Kate
9. “Don’t you know how to knock, phlegm-wad?” —Buzz
10. “I wouldn’t let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass!” —Buzz
11. “Say…is it true French babes don’t shave their pits?” —Buzz
12. “Buzz, I’m reading through all your private stuff, you better come out and pound me!” —Kevin
Related: Who Are the Culkin Brothers? All About Macaulay Culkin’s Siblings
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13. “I made my family disappear.” —Kevin
14. “Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen.” —Kevin
15. “Hey, I’m gonna give you to the count of ten, to get your ugly, yella, no-good keister off my property, before I pump your guts full of lead! 1, 2, 10!” —Gangster Johnny
16. “A lovely cheese pizza. Just for me.” —Kevin
17. “I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap, including all my major crevices…including in between my toes and in my belly button, which I never did before but sort of enjoyed.” —Kevin
18. “Has this toothbrush been approved by the American Dental Association?” —Kevin
Related: Everything You Want to Know About the “Warm and Menacing” House in the Original Home Alone
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19. “You can be too old for a lot of things, but you’re never too old to be afraid.” —Marley
20. “Damn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What’s next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?” —Santa Claus
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21. “This is my house. I have to defend it.” —Kevin
22. “Why the hell are you dressed like a chicken?” —Marv
23. “Merry Christmas, little fella. We know that you’re in there, and that you’re all alone.” —Harry
24. “You guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more?” —Kevin
25. “Down here, you big horse’s ass. Come and get me before I call the police.” —Kevin
26. “All the great ones leave their mark. We’re the wet bandits!” —Marv
27. “A, I’m not that lucky. Two, we use smoke detectors and D, we live on the most boring street in the whole United States of America, where nothing even remotely dangerous will happen. Period.” —Buzz
28. “I don’t care if I have to get out on your runway and hitchhike! If it costs me everything I own, if I have to sell my soul to the devil himself, I am going to get home to my son.” —Kate
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29. “Will you please tell Santa that instead of presents this year, I just want my family back.” —Kevin
30. “I got you milk, eggs and fabric softener.” —Kevin
31. “KEVIN!” —Kate
Next, Check Out the Best Christmas Movies to Watch Right Now on Netflix
