Illustration by Christine Wei
Back in my native New York, I practised for my upcoming emigration to Vancouver. As I got off a bus in Manhattan, I turned to the driver and said “thank you driver.” Three other people behind me also said thank you. I looked back at the driver. Her mouth was hanging open. She was flabbergasted.
My first test of Canadian civility took place as I departed the airport. Would I abandon the luggage cart next to the car that was picking me up or would I walk back the 20 yards (18.288 metres) to the luggage cart drop off area? Not wanting to get thrown out of Vancouver on my first day, I dutifully returned the cart to its rightful place.
I’ve now been in Vancouver for six months and I cannot help but notice some differences between my new home and my old one. Let’s start with the most important one:
Public toilets: If you need a bathroom while walking around Manhattan – good luck! Don’t count on restaurant bathrooms, unless you are a customer. Department store bathrooms have codes which are closely guarded secrets by associates who are never around. There are some public restrooms in parks, but chances are they won’t be open. Once, in lower Manhattan, I saw one of those half-a-block long restroom trailers. I thought it was a mirage, but I wasn’t in the desert – I was on Wall Street. I climbed up the three steps and entered. Everything was new, clean and sparkling. As I exited the facility a young guy rushed up to me: “Hey, you can’t use that. It’s only for the people working on the movie.” Here in Vancouver, there are facilities everywhere and they even have helpful signs on how to wash your hands. Go (to the bathroom) Vancouver!
Money: No pennies in Canada to burn holes in your pocket. Round up. Round down. You hardly ever have to use actual money. Merchants cheerfully shove a credit card terminal at you even for less than $2. Do not try that in New York. It will definitely be hazardous to your health. I like to use cash because I get a kick out of the colourful money. By the way, are Sir Wilfred Laurier and Sir John A McDonald the same person with different haircuts?
Politeness: Canadians have a reputation for politeness. I still get a thrill when I hear sooory, even though I hear it about 14 times a day. In Vancouver, cars stop for pedestrians crossing the street or even when you’re just coming out of your house. In New York, you’re on your own – you against the driver. If you’re lucky the car will swerve around you. I prefer New York where you can’t take anything for granted. It keeps you on your toes.
Buses in Vancouver will have a sign: “Sorry, Out of Service.” In New York, the sign just says “Out of Service.” What’s implied is: We don’t really care. Deal with it. In Vancouver, the driver will yell out “hang on please,” if not everyone is seated. In New York, passengers just pick themselves up from the floor.
I asked a staff person to help me find an item in the supermarket of my new hometown. Smiling, she came out from behind the bakery counter, walked me to the proper aisle and even took the item off the shelf and handed it to me. In New York, even if you could find someone who worked in the store, they would be annoyed that they’re being interrupted and wouldn’t know where the item is anyway.
Not too long ago in Vancouver, I was caught in the middle of a rare road rage incident. We were stopped for a long red light. The guy behind me and the driver ahead of me in the right lane were going at it tooth and nail. The F-bomb was loudly hurled back and forth. Then, the driver from the front car made eye contact with me. He lowered his voice and said to me: “Sooory about all this.”
There’s no politeness among New Yorkers, but unlike their reputation, they are very helpful, especially in emergencies.
Writing like a Canadian: I can deal with grey instead of gray, or centre instead of center, or litre instead of liter (1 litre = 33.84 fluid ounces), but I cannot understand the extra letters – favourite, honour, humour, neighbourhood, and flavour. As a busy New Yorker, I don’t have time for these extra letters.
The CFL and the NFL: Kramer on Seinfeld, was once offered Super Bowl tickets. He turned them down saying that he was only interested in the CFL. I’m with Kramer. The CFL is much more fun to watch than the plodding NFL where it’s rare to have six plays in a row before a stoppage for a penalty, an injury, a random commercial or a 10-minute video review. With its three downs and larger field and more ways to score, the CFL flows better and is more exciting.
All in all, I have to say that both Vancouver and New York are pretty good places to live. However, if push comes to shove, I have to choose Vancouver, especially if I need a bathroom.
Don Goldstein lives in Vancouver.
First Person is a daily personal piece submitted by readers. Have a story to tell? See our guidelines at tgam.ca/essayguide.
