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Despite being away from home several months a year as a freelance travel writer, I’m an anxious traveller. I hate airports. I sleep terribly the night before a flight. And COVID-19 has made me extra worried about getting sick on planes. And while I don’t have relatives to visit in the United States, if I did, crossing the border would raise a whole new set of concerns.
Apparently, I’m not alone. The uncertainty and unpredictability of travel is inherently stressful, explains registered psychologist Dr. Kristin Buhr, a director at the North Shore Stress and Anxiety Clinic in North Vancouver. While not knowing what will happen on a trip can bring excitement and an element of surprise, it can also cause worry if your tendency is to want to control things.
When people feel anxious, they also tend to focus on the negative. “We overestimate the likelihood of bad things happening, and underestimate our ability to cope with them,” said Dr. Judith Laposa, a psychologist at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto who works with people with mood and anxiety difficulties.
If you find travel stressful or anxiety-provoking, here are six strategies that can help manage the worry and make your next trip the best it can be.
Work your way up
If a long-haul trip feels overwhelming, consider a gradual approach to pushing beyond your comfort zone, Dr. Laposa says.
A day trip by public transit, followed by a weekend getaway by train, then a short-haul flight may help you work up to a longer flight with stopovers.
Identify your stressors and practice dealing with them
What part of travel stresses you out? Is it being late for a flight? Getting lost? Forgetting to pack something important? Clarifying your worries allows you to cope with them.
One technique that can help is building tolerance for uncertainty or specific anxiety-provoking scenarios by “practising” in lower-risk, less stressful situations. For example, if you’re nervous about trying different foods on your trip, Buhr suggests sampling a new item on a menu at home before you go. If you’re scared of talking to strangers while you’re away, strike up a conversation with the barista at your local café.
Plan ahead – but don’t overplan
Remembering all the details associated with travel can help ease worry before a trip, including checking that your passport is up to date and that you have received any other necessary travel documents or vaccines. Packing enough prescription medication in your carry-on, arranging for someone trustworthy to watch your pet, or planning an itinerary are also on many people’s to-do list.
But Laposa cautions against too much pretrip planning. “Overplanning may just create more stress.” For example, if you create a jam-packed itinerary with things to do every second, “will you be okay if some of it doesn’t work out due to factors outside your control? That’s where overscheduling can backfire.”
Buhr says it’s important to set realistic expectations. “Don’t go into travel expecting it will be perfect. Expect the good, neutral and the bad.”
Consider seeking support
Even before you get on the plane, navigating airports can be stressful, with long lines and unexpected delays. Give yourself extra time and consider using supports that may be available. For example, the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower program, which is available in some airports, allows people with a nonvisible disability, such as a mental health challenge, to wear a lanyard indicating they may need additional help or time.
Other people are afraid of flying. Anxieties range broadly – from fear of taking off, to turbulence, crashing, claustrophobia, or vomiting while mid-air. Some people’s anxiety is triggered by a past experience, while others have listened to the news about crashes or watched a film about one.
If anxiety is preventing you from doing activities you want to do, such as travel, experts suggest you may want to seek professional help.
Both Buhr and Laposa use cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), a psychotherapeutic approach that helps people identify and challenge the thinking patterns or beliefs and the behaviours that are maintaining or fuelling the anxiety.
Exposure therapy is a central component of CBT. It involves gradually and repeatedly “exposing” someone to feared situations to help build their confidence to tolerate it. For people with a fear of flying, this could mean watching videos of a flight, visualizing or imagining the experience, or using a flight simulator or virtual reality to mimic the experience before the person flies.
Other strategies include anti-anxiety medications and meditation apps you can use while on the plane.
Kind words and empathy can also make a huge difference. Long-time Air Canada flight attendant Sue Farquhar says she has had anxious passengers ask to stand next to her at the door to the plane while they decided if they could board. Others have asked to hold her hand during turbulence.
“If I see a nervous flyer – I can see that look on someone’s face – I will ask, are you good?” Farquhar said. “And I’ll invite them to come to the back galley to chit-chat or stretch their legs if they’re feeling anxious.”
Take care of yourself before you go
When you’re busy preparing for a trip, it can be easy to forget to look after your health. But Buhr says it’s important to try to have a good mental health baseline before you travel.
That means eating well, getting enough sleep, exercising – and making time for stress-reducing practices, such as yoga or meditation.
Remember the rewards
For me, what I love most about travel are the random acts of kindness from strangers, along with the mystery and excitement of new experiences and places. Ironically, it’s the same uncertainty that keeps me up before a flight that also keeps me getting on that next plane. Anxiety may sometimes be high, but so too are the rewards.
