Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last penny.
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This week: “I’m a 46-year-old Marketing Manager/Communications Freelancer working in the charity and arts sector in the North West of England and Wales. This is great for me as I have farming family in Wales and I get to have country breaks with them to decompress. I’ve been with my partner, A, for 21 years. He is an amazing man who has supported me so much. My partner would have loved kids and would be an amazing dad, but I don’t think my fragile mental health would cope with parenthood. I have Bipolar 1, which has really impacted my earning power over the years, whilst, conversely, triggering some quite incredible spending. I was looking at a yacht at one point. During the last big episode in 2018, I had psychosis because of a horribly pressurised job where I headed up a team. I decided it was a great idea to book a £4,000 yoga retreat in Portugal. I don’t even like yoga. One of my team had to get on the phone to the retreat and cancel it. Above and beyond his job description! I’ve now left all thoughts of high-powered jobs behind as that style of work isn’t for me. I’m well at the moment, but stress can trigger relapses, so I avoid it all costs. I’m a saver these days, manage money well, but I do treat myself too.”
Occupation: Marketing Manager/Freelancer
Industry: Arts/Charity
Age: 46
Location: Manchester
Salary: £9,600, plus variable freelance earnings (last year it was about £8,000). With this, I use my savings for treats and holidays and pay for household repairs and the boring stuff.
Paycheque Amount: £800
Number of housemates: One, A, my partner of 21 years.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: I give £300 for mortgage and bills, which goes to A as he manages household accounts. I concentrate on managing my money. Our mortgage is £112 a month, with seven years to go. We know how fortunate we are to be in this situation.
Loan payments: 0.
Savings: £17,973.97 ISA, £150 rainy day account, £448 holiday account, £1,000 easy access savings, £8,747.93 Offset account for the mortgage. This is my contribution, hence our low mortgage. I overpay from freelance earnings when I can. A chips in, too. He has a fixed income, but it’s not huge as he works for a charity.
Pension? I’m going to be very poor. I have two university pensions, but I have no idea how much. I need to check. I was feckless with money due to mental health when I was younger and didn’t think a pension was ‘useful’. I stand to inherit some money, I’ve got some money in trust and A has a good pension. I’m aware this is not a good situation.
Utilities: Covered under £300 to A.
All other monthly payments: £10.33 SIM only, £25 credit card payment. My credit card debt is £673.13 at a 0% rate until 2026. I throw spare freelance money at it all the time to top it up. Subscriptions: £6.99 Netflix, £0.99 Apple storage, £11.45 prescription, £12.99 Readlly for my newspaper/magazine habit.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I got a good maintenance grant, my folks helped me out now and again and I had a very low student loan of about £3,000, which is paid off. I worked every university holiday and in term time. I earned between £3 – £3.50 an hour for factory work, bar work and working at a cinema. At my ‘elite’ university, all my friends had a lot of money. Working during term time wasn’t ‘allowed’ without your tutor’s permission, which was frankly ridiculous and this didn’t acknowledge people from poorer backgrounds. I still grind my teeth about this.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
We were lower middle class. Money was tight, but my parents prioritised getting a biggish house for four kids and camping holidays in France. They were very savvy about money, whilst I spent money like water and did not listen to advice.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents/guardians house?
I was 19. I had a breakdown just before my third year when I was 22 and went home for a year. It wasn’t a great time.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
I was 24 when I finally completed my degree. My partner and I have taken turns supporting each other — when I’ve been ill, when he was a mature student and when we’ve been between jobs. It’s worked out well and has strengthened our relationship.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I had a pub job in my local when I was 16, collecting glasses. I then got ‘promoted’ to bar work when I was 18 for £2.50 an hour. I wanted money to spend on clothes, records, and gigs.
Do you worry about money now?
Yes. The worry is caused by bipolar, as it can affect my ability to work. I was £60,000 in debt due to bipolar spending (which is common), but I paid it off, thanks to my friend J. She organised my (many) debt repayments and gave me £70 spending money a month, for which I’m eternally grateful. I now have savings and an excellent credit record. Our outgoings are low and we still manage to get weekends away and foreign holidays each year, which is good for my mental health. I count my blessings.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
I got £7,000 from my aunt. My cousin didn’t want any money from her abusive mother and gave it to me, which was so generous of her. I put the money into our mortgage and a holiday. I received £3,000 from my grandmother. I wasted that. There’s some money in trust which is £15,000 from my dad. I have no idea when I will get my hands on that (when my mum dies, I think). A also received £17,000 from his mum.
Day One
8:30 a.m. — Wake up and faff. Last week, I had a horrible working week when a colleague screamed at me. It’s cast a big shadow and I feel weird and I’m not sleeping, which is a big no-no for bipolar. But we’re going out today to an Irish Festival as A is Irish.
10:30 a.m. — Get the bus into town, I pay for us both, £4.
11 a.m. — Grab some coffee beans from The Mexican Coffee Company. A pays.
12 p.m. — Head to Selfridges. Buy a beautiful Penhaligons’ perfume atomiser, which the lovely assistant fills up with perfume. Perfume is my thing and guaranteed to give me a lift after last week’s dreadful working week. A offers to pay, but I pay, £35.
12:30 p.m. — Head to the pub and get two rounds of Guinness Zero. I pay,£20.
2:30 p.m. — Watch the .
3 p.m. — Have a carafe of wine in an amazing wine bar. A pays.
5 p.m. — Get Thai for lunch and split the bill. We get some doggy bags at the end to take home and my share comes to £43.95.
7 p.m. — Back to the wine bar. I pay for two glasses of lush wine, £18.
8 p.m. — Uber home. A pays.
8:30 p.m. — Turn on Netflix and watch some terribly forgettable films.
10:30 p.m. — Lights out. Sleep.
Total: £120.95
Day Two
8 a.m. — Up. I still feel bad about last week. I make coffee with my lockdown coffee machine, Luigi. The Mexican coffee beans are gorgeous (and we drink a lot of coffee).
8:15 a.m. — I open my bank App. Ouch. I spent a lot of money yesterday. I check my account every day, which is a good habit.
9 a.m. — I reluctantly start work. There is so much to do. I work two days a week for pay well below my grade, but it’s easy.
1:45 p.m. — This job is vile. I eat a sandwich at my desk whilst reading a report.
2 p.m. — Lie on the bed with an audiobook — Small Fires — which I got on the free library app, BorrowBox.
3 p.m. — My friend K phones. I was broken last week, but we end up screaming with laughter. We should be on the stage. It would be a good side hustle.
4 p.m. — Write my bit of a funding bid for a client.
6 p.m. — Cook lentil and potato curry with naans and samosas from the cupboard. We’re trying to eat healthily and cheaply.
7 p.m. — Head to my bed with more audiobook.
9 p.m. — It is a false economy with audiobooks. I fall asleep and miss the story, meaning I am bound to buy the Kindle book in the AM (boo, Amazon). Sleep again.
Day Three
8 a.m. — Listen to the news. I pull the duvet over my head in horror. I don’t buy the book. Winning.
9 a.m. — I do my accounts as I’m determined to get a handle on my tax for this year.
10 a.m. — Self-care with a bath and Woman’s Hour. Rage at misogyny.
12 p.m. — I fire up the laptop. I’m doing a freelance theatre job with a producer, L, who is one ace woman. In between planning a marketing campaign, booking ads, liaising with venues and writing copy, I’m texting with my friend J. He’s also having a bad time at work. How difficult is it to be civilised in the workplace?
6:30 p.m. — It was a productive day. It is great working with L, who lives by the motto ‘work hard and be nice to people’.
7 p.m. — A cooks ravioli, garlic bread and salad from the fridge. Watch the news. The world has gone mad.
8 p.m. — Watch The Leopard on Netflix, a sublime sub-titled Italian costume drama.
10 p.m. — Bed. Scroll through Italian holidays. In years past, I would have booked something pricey within 10 minutes. I manage to sleep, but I toss and turn all night.
Day Four
6:15 a.m. — Three hours sleep. This is not good. Sleep is imperative to me. I’m still dealing with the aftermath of last week. I’m fretting a lot.
6:30 a.m. — Read the newspaper. So grim. Why do I do this to myself?
7 a.m. — Shower and then have a fantastic coffee from the Mexican beans, plus two yellow stickered hot cross buns (of course).
7:45 a.m. — Enjoy a sunshine-filled walk to the bus stop which cheers me up. Get the bus to see my charity client, £2.
8:45 a.m. — Nip to B&M and buy two Spice Tailor curry kits for £1.87.
9 a.m. — The senior managers are away, but the young project team, B, M, and S, are in, so there’s a lot of laughter. They view me as Yoda (full of wisdom), which is daft but funny. I’m working on a new website for them.
12:45 p.m. — Lunch of last night’s leftovers. Full marks.
3 p.m. — I crumble and nip to the cafe next door for lemon drizzle cake, latte and biscuits for the gang, £6.50.
5:30 p.m. — Get the bus home, £2.
6:15 p.m. — A cooks ravioli from the fridge. Convinced he has shares in that particular pasta company.
7 p.m. — We watch the news. We rant at the friendly newsreader on the TV. Poor lady.
8 p.m. — I mistakenly read an email from my toxic workplace and read it to A. A never swears. He swears.
9 p.m. — Go to bed. Mulling over the work situation. I need to stay in the role as I need the regular money. But my trust is gone. Sleep.
Total: £12.37
Day Five
9 a.m. — The most excellent sleep. Have two hot cross buns from the stash (the stash is now finished). Gutted.
10 a.m. — I do some life admin of looking at any financial savings I can make, plus browse for a holiday for later in the year. A & I split holidays, although in the past I’ve bought them outright when I’ve felt flush. Then we always do a kitty together on Revolut for spending.
1 p.m. — K phones. Epic rant interspersed by hysterical laughter. She’s been researching bipolar in the workplace and my rights. Legend.
2 p.m. — Do some more work on the funding bid.
4 p.m. — Get up, scrub up with a full face of make-up and actual clothes, as I’m going to the theatre show I’ve been working on. The performer, E, name-checked me in a radio interview yesterday. I daydream about a Hollywood career as a hotshot PR. LA house, the Oscars, swimming pool etc. Park that idea.
5:30 p.m. — Get the bus into Manchester, £2.
8 p.m. — Meet friend K. Buy a large wine pre-show, £7. Watch the show.
9:30 p.m. — Drinks and laughs with the team. There’s quite a few drinks and it is £38 for my round.
10:30 p.m. — Uber home. Woman penalty. Public transport where I live is rubbish and not always that safe, £7.81.
11 a.m. — Debrief with A. Working on the show has been a roller coaster. Creative people are wonderful but not always easy to work with…
12 p.m. — Sleep.
Total: £54.81
Day Six
9 a.m. — I get a lie-in with a proper sleep and wake up, perky. Air punch. I listen to the news on the radio, swig Mexican coffee, crave hot cross buns (the cupboard is bare), but settle for cereal. Read the newspaper on Readlly. The world HAS gone mad.
11 a.m. — Invoicing and freelance accounts. I will get ahead of myself for year-end.
1 p.m. — Get the bus, £2.
1:30 p.m. — Meet my friend K at the local hospital where she’s having some treatment. I buy us coffee and cakes, £10.75.
3 p.m. — K drives us to our fave pub.
3:30 p.m. — We are here for the legendary cheese and onion pie. We are Northerners, after all. I buy two craft lagers she gets 2 x 0% Heinekens. She’s in recovery and is amazing. The nights out we used to have…I draw a veil. I’m aware of how I drink sometimes to manage my mood, so I try to rein it in these days. My share is £24 for food and drinks.
6 p.m. — K drives me home.
7 p.m. — Watch TV with A.
10 p.m. — Reflect that I am indeed an adult, as I will attend an event for my ‘bad job’ tomorrow. I’m also networking to meet potential clients as my exit strategy.
10:30 p.m. — Sleep.
Total: £36.75
Day Seven
9 a.m. — I check my bank app. There is a loyalty payment of £50 from Nationwide. Hurrah. This cheers me up. I advise anyone to shop around for the rewards you can get for moving your current account around. It’s easy money. I move some money into my credit card on top of my minimum payment.
11:30 a.m. — Get the bus to an event in a nearby town. I pay for A too, £4.
12:30 p.m. — A is riding shotgun with me in case the shouty colleague will be there. She won’t be. Working Saturday is ‘too much’. Right-o.
1:30 p.m. — The event is a beautiful celebration of young people. I talk to the artists and see the exhibition in the gallery. I’m very conscious that this is a poor town with poverty all around me. Count my financial good fortune. Get coffee for A & I. He pays.
5:15 p.m. — Head to lunch at our favourite Italian restaurant. Arancini, for starters and then he has a steak as big as his hand. I have spinach ravioli, a Campari spritz and we share a bottle of fab wine. My share is £52.87.
7:15 p.m. — Uber home. I pay, £8.65.
8 p.m. — TV with a reward of some wine from our wine rack. More of The Leopard.
11 p.m. — Sleep.
Total: £65.62
The Breakdown
Conclusion
“That was an expensive week for me. Roughly a quarter of my salary. Eeek. The rest of the month is going to be low-spend! I may top up with some money coming in from a freelance project. I did go out a record-breaking number of four times, which is a lot for me these days, as I am no longer the ‘madcap party girl’ who was out seven nights a week. I need to get back to the habit of using the notes app on my phone to track my spending and then to work out what’s left at the end of the month. Sometimes, when it’s a good month, I have some money left and it’s very satisfying to put that (however small the amount) into my credit card or savings. I get a buzz out of being better with money. Having a couple of years out of work due to my illness, it’s essential that I have a financial cushion if I get ill again, which is always possible.”
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