Phyllis Meiklejohn: Educator. Wife. Aunt. Chatelaine. Born May 11, 1933, in Weyburn, Sask.; died Dec. 12, 2024, in Toronto, of natural causes; aged 91.
Phyllis MeiklejohnCourtesy of family
Life can thrust you far away from the plans you had for yourself growing up. Phyllis Judson was a Prairie girl, daughter of a hardware merchant, youngest of three sisters and, at 22, among the last cases of polio in Saskatchewan. She spent her life defying the barriers her generation placed on women with crutches.
Phyllis thought, but never really knew, that the polio came from a potato salad at a country fair. A recent graduate in home economics from the University of Manitoba, she was hired for the summer in 1955 to judge local recipes – pies, salads, casseroles and such – around Saskatchewan. One night, while staying with her sister Sylvia and brother-in-law Paul, she realized she couldn’t move her legs. Paul’s sister Eleanor – a nurse – immediately recognized the symptoms and called Paul’s brother – a doctor – who diagnosed polio. Phyllis always said that early diagnosis kept her out of an iron lung – a breathing machine that was both a prison and a lifesaver for those with polio at that time. Compared to that fate, crutches were the better option.
At the time, Phyllis was engaged to Robert Meiklejohn, a fellow student, studying interior design at the University of Manitoba. After her diagnosis, she broke off the engagement, feeling it wouldn’t be fair to him and not knowing what lay in store for her.
Phyllis was still young but she was pragmatic. She knew she had to find her own way. That trait stood her well as she tackled her new life. Her vibrant personality, optimism and family support eventually led to graduate work in home economics in Oregon and Arizona.
Then, a fairy tale kicked in and true love won out. Nearly a decade later, still studying in Arizona, Phyllis read an article about an up and coming interior designer in Toronto. She wrote a letter to Bob’s sister and mother, congratulating her old fiancé on his success. The letter was passed on to Bob who waited six months before responding. He said he knew that if they met again, they would be together for the rest of their lives. They married in Toronto in 1964 – and were together until Phyllis’s death.
Bob and Phyllis settled in Toronto and Phyllis worked as a home economics professor and published author at what was then known as Ryerson Polytechnic Institute. The couple also bought an 1850s country house in Colebrook, Ont., on the Napanee River. They filled both their homes with lovely things, and each one graced the covers of both Architectural Digest and City and Country Home.
As Bob’s career took off, Phyllis supported his ambitions with social gatherings. Phyllis created beautiful spaces, just as Bob did, but her focus was people. Whether a simple dinner party in Toronto or a weekend stay for friends at Colebrook, Phyllis was in control. Gracious of course, she knew exactly when to weigh in or bow out, though sometimes was annoyingly inflexible or even willfully blind if she decided not to deal with something. But Phyllis was a master at the smile, the gesture and the welcome made only for you, so people bent to her will, whether they knew it or not.
Although Phyllis and Bob had no children, they each had extended family and Phyllis was particularly close to her sister Sylvia’s children, who called her “Til.” It was a nickname she adored for the rest of her life.
Her innate understanding of the barriers she and others faced also led to volunteer work as a director on the board of March of Dimes. But her focus was always on home, family and their eclectic mix of friends who, once part of their circle, tended never to leave.
In her later years, Phyllis developed something called “post-polio syndrome,” which led to more time in a wheelchair, brought her near constant pain and contributed to her being mostly bedridden over the last 20 years of her life. Yet her joy at seeing friends and family never diminished.
Phyllis taught us all to value the moment, to look to the future and not dwell on the past. Through it all she built a life of accomplishment, lived with courage and verve and a happy determination to win the game. That is her legacy.
Heather Ferguson is the wife of Phyllis’s nephew, Cameron Turner.
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