Quote of the Day: Dr. Ruth Westheimer Believed True Happiness Begins With Taking Charge of Your Own Life

Dr. Ruth Westheimer made her mark encouraging honest conversation about sex. With her quick wit and warm sense of humor, the beloved sex therapist, educator, and media personality broke down barriers around topics that had long been considered taboo. Through her bestselling books, radio shows, television appearances and decades of counseling, she empowered millions of people to embrace healthy relationships with knowledge, confidence and compassion.

Yet Dr. Ruth’s impact reached far beyond sex education. A Holocaust survivor who lost her parents during World War II, she rebuilt her life as a refugee, educator, psychologist and bestselling author. She turned unimaginable tragedy into a lifelong mission to help others live happier, healthier and more connected lives. Her resilience, optimism, and belief that laughter could make even difficult conversations easier endeared her to legions of fans.

As her fame grew throughout the 1980s and beyond, Dr. Ruth became one of America’s most recognizable personalities. She starred in her own radio and television programs, wrote more than 40 books, made cameo appearances in films and television shows, voiced animated characters, inspired the Off-Broadway play Becoming Dr. Ruth and was the subject of the acclaimed 2019 documentary Ask Dr. Ruth.

Related: Quote of the Day: Poet Maya Angelou on Passion, Drive and Putting Your Heart in ‘Everything You Do’

Dr. Ruth was also one of late-night television’s most beloved guests, making memorable appearances with hosts like David Letterman, whose trademark deadpan was often no match for Dr. Ruth’s uninhibited humor and candid relationship advice. With her infectious laugh and willingness to tackle even the most awkward questions, she charmed audiences while leaving more than a few talk show hosts blushing.

Even in her 90s, Dr. Ruth showed no signs of slowing down. In 2023, New York Gov. Kathy Hochul named her the state’s first honorary Ambassador to Loneliness. She was recognized for her commitment to helping people combat social isolation and build meaningful relationships. It was a role that reflected what Dr. Ruth had always believed: that emotional connection is just as important as physical intimacy. “I don’t want to be known only as a sex therapist,” she said at the time. “I want to be known as a therapist.”

Dr. Ruth died on July 12, 2024, at the age of 96, leaving behind a legacy that continues to inspire. As the anniversary of her passing, her words remind us that curiosity, kindness, resilience, and genuine human connection can enrich every stage of life. That’s what makes Dr. Ruth the perfect inspiration for today’s Quote of the Day.

Related: Quote of the Day: Novelist Nora Roberts on How It’s Better To Keep Going Than Not Try at All

Quote of the Day by Dr. Ruth Westheimer

“Take responsibility for your own happiness. Never put it in other people’s hands.”
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer

Dr. Ruth Westheimer shared this powerful advice in a 2016 interview for Harvard Business Review’s Life’s Work series, in which influential figures reflected on the experiences, lessons and values that shaped their careers. Looking back on her extraordinary journey—from Holocaust survivor and refugee to pioneering therapist, bestselling author and beloved media personality—Dr. Ruth spoke about the importance of taking ownership of one’s own life and choices.

What Did Dr. Ruth Mean by “Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness”?

The quote captures a philosophy that guided her for decades: happiness is not something another person can give us or something we should wait for someone else to create. While relationships, friendships and loved ones can bring tremendous joy and meaning, Dr. Ruth believed that each person must also nurture their own sense of purpose, confidence and fulfillment.

Related: Quote of the Day: Philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau—‘What Wisdom Can You Find That Is Greater Than Kindness?’

Why Dr. Ruth’s Advice Still Matters Today

The deeper meaning behind her words becomes even more powerful when viewed through the lens of her remarkable life. As a child, Ruth Westheimer endured unimaginable loss after being sent away from Nazi Germany on a Kindertransport-like rescue effort and never seeing her parents again. She later rebuilt her life across Europe, Israel and the United States, overcoming displacement, hardship and uncertainty before earning advanced degrees and becoming one of the world’s most recognized advocates for communication and connection.

Dr. Ruth’s message was never that life would be easy. She believed that people have the ability to shape their futures by refusing to surrender their power to fear, disappointment or circumstances beyond their control. Her own story demonstrated that resilience begins with the belief that we can continue moving forward. Even after experiencing profound challenges.

More Inspiring Quotes From Dr. Ruth Westheimer

“Love at first sight doesn’t exist. The only thing that can exist at first sight is an interest in developing a relationship.”

“If you face a problem, don’t tell yourself that you can’t do it. Convince yourself that you have the strength to deal with almost anything.”

“My favorite thing about sex? It brings people closer.”

“When it comes to sex, the most important six inches are the ones between the ears.”

“Remember, attraction is only one part of a relationship. Loyalty, commitment, and responsibility are the other parts.”

“It is relatively easy for a person to lie. Saying “I love you” takes little or no effort. However, demonstrating love requires involvement, participation, and action. If your relationship doesn’t have any involvement, participation, and action, then you can assume it also has very little love.”

Next, Quote of the Day: Novelist Flannery O’Connor on How Truth ‘Does Not Change According to Our Ability to Stomach It Emotionally’