What makes a great bash? Partygoers and throwers share their favourite memories | Canada Voices

I’m asked, often, about my favourite party. For a social columnist, now on the beat for more than a decade, I liken the question to picking a favourite child. They’re all great in their own way. So my reply nearly always is, “tomorrow night’s!” And I mean it.

Parties present the possibility of something great that’s to come – some compelling new person, place or idea that gets shared during a cocktail hour or dinner. It’s exciting to see the progress of an organization growing from year to year, finding their footing and supporters. It’s thrilling to see inside of someone’s home for the first time, to understand how they live and how they define a celebration. (Any time there are more than three people in a room, I consider it a celebration.)

So, seeing as my answer to “what’s the best party you’ve ever attended?” results in a deflection-cum-credo, I thought it might be nice to check in with a bunch of social regulars – partygoers and throwers – from across Canada, to hear from them about what they feel makes for a good gathering and what their favourite parties were. – Nolan Bryant, society columnist

Moez Kassam

Toronto-based hedge fund manager and philanthropist, founder of Anson Funds

My favourite party memory: I’m biased toward my own parties! I threw a party for my wife’s 40th birthday at the beginning of last summer in Muskoka. It was on the Canada Day long weekend. We had a bunch of people, live music and the head chef from Miku Toronto prepared a 100-pound tuna that I brought in from Japan, which really made the experience fun.

Advice: Have some type of “wow” experience at your party. Emphasize one thing that makes the night interesting – whether it be the food or the wine or a particular live band, have one thing that leads engagement and gets people hyped in advance. Happiness is reality over expectation.

Catherine Nugent

Toronto-based social doyenne, Glitter Girl and co-founder of galas including Bloor Street Entertains and the Brazilian Ball

My favourite party memory: I gave a wonderful party years ago for Town & Country magazine. I put all my furniture in a moving van and filled my house with round tables and tablecloths and invited 150 people. That was a whole lot of fun.

Advice: Use decoration to transport people at your parties. I always invite all my friends who have no other Christmas parties to attend and have a 12-person Christmas dinner – my husband used to joke that we were the “waifs and strays.”

For one of these, I decided I wanted my guests to feel like they were somewhere warm, such as Los Angeles or Brazil. I used spring flowers, including tulips and daffodils, and other decorations to really give people an escape. The only trouble was, the next day, I had to put all the Christmas decorations back for the children!

Ore Sami

Toronto-based founder and creative director of Sample Chief – a global collective celebrating African music

My favourite party memory: The first time we threw our Village Boogie series in Toronto in August, 2023, is one of my favourites. It was special to see a space full of Black faces, who really showed up dressed to impress, enjoying African music. It brought the culture, and the music was great.

Advice: Putting on a party should be a labour of love. Music is a big part of that. Whenever I curate music for a party, instead of just sticking to one sound, era or genre, I always put myself in my guests’ shoes and wonder what would get them dancing, make them feel happy and euphoric, and bring back a memory or inspire conversation.

Kaelen Haworth

Toronto-based founder and creative director at clothing boutique Absolutely Fabrics

My favourite party memory: I love an intergenerational holiday party. When I was little, my parents threw Christmas parties and carried on that tradition throughout my university years. It was a great excuse to spend time with my friends and also my parents’ and my brothers’ friends, who I was in love with at the time. My favourite one was when we introduced karaoke. Everyone walked in expecting to be civilized – all dressed up – but by the end, it got absolutely crazy. I cherish that memory.

Advice: Add some sort of surprise element. At a party I hosted to celebrate fashion designers at my store, we used drapery to create an enclosed space in the middle of the room. People had to enter and leave through it, which made it feel warm and intimate.

Christie Garofalo, Vancouver-based philanthropist and mother of five

My favourite party memory: My favourite party was a charity event for the annual BC Women’s Health Foundation Glow Gala, where we honoured the OB/GYN who was my doctor when I delivered my children. We were raising money to start a mature women’s health department. It was special because we were able to get Michael Bublé, whose wife is also a patient of the doctor, to call in from his concert at Vancouver’s Rogers Arena to honour the doctor in front of thousands of people. It was an amazing experience and great way to connect people.

Advice: Relax in the moment. Have all your pieces in place beforehand so you can enjoy the party. If you’re throwing a party or charity event, a lot of people are coming to those things because they want some of your time.

Jimmy Molloy

Toronto-based partner at real estate company Molloy + Van Wert, former restaurateur

My favourite party memory: The best party I attended was Ted Rogers’s 75th birthday party. The party was great, and in a way, it ended up being a celebration of life, since it was his last birthday party. It was special to get to celebrate a great man that way.

Advice: My wife Bernadette and I began throwing our own Christmas party, called the Swill, after 9/11. It was such a tragedy and the tone of the world seemed quite serious after that. We’ve carried on the tradition of sending funny invitations to let people know this is an unserious, fun Christmas party.

I think, with the pandemic, that’s become important again – to let people know they can relax, get together and have fun. Also, build your guest list around variety and include people from different walks of life. It allows for serendipity and surprise.

Chantal Durivage

Montreal-based co-founder of the M.A.D. Festival

My favourite party memory: My favourite party was the 25th anniversary celebration of the M.A.D. Festival, which we threw at the W hotel in Montreal. The dress code was “dress to impress” and we had a red carpet where people were being interviewed about their involvement with the festival over the past 25 years. People spent a lot of time giving their testimonials and listening to each other. The party spilled outside – there were even guests having martinis on the sidewalk, listening and supporting each other.

Advice: Craft a good invitation. You want people to feel the emotion you want them to experience at your party from the invitation. If you plan on having a funky party, make the invitation funky.

Daniel Abichandani

Toronto-based partner at EY and past co-chair of the Art Gallery of Ontario’s Art Bash

My favourite party memory: The AGO’s Art Bash in 2022. It was the first time the AGO combined this high-end party with their fundraiser and AGO Massive, which draws a younger crowd. It was really nice to mix the two crowds, meet fresh faces and feel the energy of both groups.

Advice: Fashion and fun are two things I look for at an event. There’s an element of people-watching at parties, so as host, give people an excuse to elevate their dress from the day-to-day clothes they wear.

Kelly Streit

Calgary-based founder of Mode Models International, past co-chair of the LOOK Gala

My favourite party memory: The LOOK Gala that we threw in 2024 to fundraise for Contemporary Calgary, an art gallery. That year, the theme was the Dada Ball. It’s the last one that I threw and it was fun because it celebrated Dadaism – nonsense! There was this 10-foot gummy bear sculpture. People came dressed with asymmetrical masks, hair and makeup, and it was all colourful and fun.

With LOOK, we are a contemporary art institute all about expression, protest and the story and rationale behind art. I think what’s fun about our gala is that people get to do that for themselves. We want people to feel 100 per cent about themselves. I’ve had UCPers at this gala, people who are considered very right-wing, who might not typically be into drag queens and things that overtly queer. But they saw it and actually loved it. I received rave reviews for that gala, and I love to open eyes.

Advice: Be in good spirits to be a great guest. A great Maya Angelou quote that I love is: “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

These interviews have been edited and condensed.