Staying in: When grown children decide to live with their parents | Canada Voices

For many young Canadians, living at home with parents – instead of facing today’s economic uncertainty alone – can be appealing.

With high rents, declining housing affordability and stagnant incomes, a growing number of young adults are making this choice: According to Statistics Canada, 35 per cent of 20- to 34-year-olds were living with a parent in 2021, up from 31 per cent in 2001. Among 20- to 29-year-olds, 45.8 per cent were living with at least one parent in 2021, according to a 2024 Vanier Institute report.

The Globe and Mail spoke with young adults about the realities of remaining at home: what drove them to stay, what makes it work and the biggest challenges. Each of these respondents reside in Ontario, which at 53.3 per cent has one of the highest rates of twentysomethings living with parents, according to the Vanier Institute report. Nunavut is the highest with 54.7 per cent.

Each expressed a similar sentiment: Living at home is now culturally accepted. It offers a chance to save for a home, education or travel. Their Gen X parents, they say, recognize how difficult it is to find your footing these days. And yet most still feel a quiet, self-imposed pressure to leave.

David Clarke: ‘Staying home is the best option’

While completing his bachelor’s degree in English, David Clarke rented an apartment with a friend just outside York University’s campus. Living in Toronto had its benefits: He was close to a subway station so he could enjoy the city, he scored relatively low rent during a dip in prices in 2021 and liked his independence. He also did his own grocery shopping, chores and meal prep.

Unable to find meaningful work after graduating in 2023, Clarke moved back into his family’s home in Guelph, Ont. The 25-year-old now works full time at the University of Guelph’s exam centre. Without rent or grocery expenses, he can save more than half of the $2,800 he brings home each month as he weighs his next step: law school, a second degree that would improve his job prospects or building a nest egg for whatever comes next.

How we make it work: My parents and I have a general respect for each other. They treat me like an adult. Living at home has also allowed me to travel: I visited family in Florence a couple of years ago, and last year, I visited Denmark and Norway.

My 86-year-old grandmother also lives down the street from me. I help her out by taking her grocery shopping, helping her run errands and with tasks around the house, which gives my parents some peace of mind.

What makes it hard: It can feel like I’m trapped or not progressing in life. Some people around me are getting married, buying places and moving forward in their careers, and it can feel like I’m not doing enough. The majority of my friends still live at home and my parents never pressure me, so there’s no real outside push to leave. But I often feel like I’m falling behind when I compare myself to people on social media.

My next goal: Even though I save most of the money I make, I know that it wouldn’t be enough to buy a home in this part of the country. I wrote my law school admission test last year to keep the option open, but law school is expensive. I would be open to renting if circumstances required it, if I found a job in a different city. But the way my life is situated right now, staying home is the best option for me.

Eunice Yeung: ‘My parents believe in me’

Eunice Yeung lived at a Toronto Metropolitan University residence for three years and then left for Singapore in early 2020. What was supposed to be a semester-long exchange was cut short months later by the COVID-19 pandemic, and she returned to her parents’ house and finished her degree in new media. Since then, the 27-year-old has been living with her parents in a suburb just north of Toronto as she builds a career as a DJ and content creator on social media, where she often includes her parents in her videos.

How we make it work: I have a good relationship with my parents. We don’t argue. Any time we have a disagreement we are able to talk it out and resolve it. I help by going to the grocery store with my parents and by making small contributions, such as buying them meals, to show I appreciate them.

What makes it hard: Most of the gigs I get as a DJ are downtown. It’s challenging because they often end late and Ubers home can cost me $50 to $60, which can add up when I’m performing sets weekly. Now, I often end up crashing at a friend’s house since it’s more convenient. My parents are also concerned about my spending and can sometimes be critical when they see a package arriving at the door or how often I order Uber Eats.

My next goal is: Long term, the goal is to continue building my career as a content creator. I have over 100 million views between TikTok and Instagram, but unlike my friends in the U.S., Canadians do not make money through the Creator Rewards Program, which makes monetization difficult. My parents believe in me and my ability to be successful as a creative, which is why they don’t mind me living with them. They realized that my content is doing well when my Dad started getting recognized in the mall or in public, from my videos. The plan is to be able to afford a place downtown. I’m open to renting or buying – I just want views of the lake.

Isabella Iacovone: ‘I often felt trapped’

Isabella Iacovone lived on her own at 20, when she moved to Scotland through a University of Toronto student exchange program. The experience was jarring at first, she says, compared with growing up at home with her parents, siblings and grandparents. After her year-long sojourn, she moved back into her family home in the suburbs of Toronto, where she has lived for three years. After graduating with a double major in Italian and art history, the 23-year-old has applied for a master’s degree in art conservation at University College London.

How we make it work: There were seven of us living in the house, but since my older siblings and grandparents moved out, I’ve had the basement to myself. Having my own space makes a big difference. I have privacy here, which I’m sure my parents also appreciate.

What makes it hard: Until I had access to a car, the commute was the biggest hurdle. At one point, I was in university full time, working a retail job near campus and working at a dog rescue. It gave me a good chunk of savings, but because my house is in the suburbs I often felt trapped. Between of the bus and subway, the commute downtown could take almost two hours, which also made getting to work, school and hanging out with friends difficult.

My parents never pressure me, haven’t given me a curfew and give me independence. All of my friends still live at home except one in her 30s. That being said, I sometimes feel like I’m stunted and like I’m still a teenager at times.

My next goal: I’ll hear back from the University College London in May. My plan is to move to the U.K. whether I get in or not, since there are more programs and entry-level job opportunities for art conservationists there. I’m saving up for a year of rent in case I don’t find a job right away.

Anthony Cusano and Isabella Sousa: ‘Most of our friends still live at home’

For high–school sweethearts Anthony Cusano, 28 and Isabella Sousa, 27, living with your parents well into – and often past – your 20s and until marriage is the norm in Italian-Canadian households like theirs. So when the couple decided to prioritize purchasing a home over spending money on a wedding, it came as a surprise to their parents.

With Cusano’s savings from his auto technician job, Sousa’s substitute teacher income and help from family, in February they were able to buy a home in Innisfil, Ont. For now, they both still live in their childhood homes in Vaughan, Ont., as they slowly furnish their new house and build a three-month emergency fund before moving in.

How we make it work: SOUSA: I live with my grandmother, mom and sister. Most of our friends still live at home, so we live close to the people we grew up with and we both have the freedom to come and go as we please.

What makes it hard: CUSANO: It was never really difficult. I have freedom at home. I have a career that I’ve built and my parents always respected me.

How we bought our house: CUSANO: My father and I were planning to buy a house together. So I had been saving money from my job for the past two years, as well as extra cash from side work. My father passed away last year, so taking this step with Isabella after 11 years of dating seemed like the right thing to do.

SOUSA: I’ve had to reprioritize. In January, my friends began planning a vacation to Punta Cana just as we were putting the offer into the house, and I had to say no to it because of the house. It can feel like I’m missing out on some of those moments with my friends that I was used to saying ‘yes’ to.

These interviews have been edited and condensed.