Generally, when people think of Bill Watterson’s comic strip Calvin and Hobbes, they think of fun, innocent adventures with a little boy and his plush tiger, oftentimes exploring the woods or riding on a sled in the snow. They may also recall the thoughtful comic strips where Calvin and Hobbes talk about life’s biggest questions. They might even think about the strips where Calvin was falling asleep in school and dreaming about being Spaceman Spiff. But every Winter, Bill Watterson would offer up much darker fare.
Calvin and Hobbes began on Nov. 18, 1985. While Watterson drew comic strips featuring snowmen in the first few years, on Feb. 28, 1988, he took a noticeably darker turn when he depicted a crowd of snowmen around the family car, as though there’d been a car accident. The beauty of the comic is the slow-burn, with Calvin seemingly-innocently making snowmen. Finally, in the last panel, the gruesome scene is revealed with his parents observing the scene, with Calvin’s dad saying, “I think we’d better get that kid to a psychologist.”
It would be almost a year before Watterson would go similarly dark with Calvin’s snowman sculptures, which is when it became a regular recurring series until the comic strip ended in 1995. Many of the strips featured death and destruction, even disturbing jokes about suicide that make you wonder how Calvin knew about this stuff. Some of the images were likely shocking, especially when juxtaposed against lighter comics like Peanuts or The Family Circus, but thanks to the multi-faceted personality Watterson crafted for Calvin, the dark jokes suited the character perfectly.
Here are the 10 darkest snowman gags that ever appeared in Calvin and Hobbes.
10
Snow sharks
While most Calvin and Hobbes comics had a classic setup and punchline in its multi-panel strips, many of Watterson’s snowman gags centered around one really funny image which didn’t require any setup (other than you knowing Calvin’s personality). This strip, featuring snow sharks about to kill a swimming snowman is a great example of Watterson using just one big panel to give his funny visual the maximum impact.
9
Surgery
Another single-panel strip with just one funny image is this one where Calvin shares his disturbed sense of humor with his neighbor Susie. It’s especially funny how far along Calvin is into sawing.
8
Calvin’s take on Frosty the Snowman
Beginning on Dec. 31, 1990, Bill Watterson began a series of comic strips spanning nearly three weeks where Calvin builds a snowman, then imagines it as a “Snow Goon” coming to life and terrorizing him. While it’s not quite as dark as the ones here, the series is really funny and one of Watterson’s best long-form stories told with Calvin and Hobbes.
The comic above falls in the middle of that series, where Calvin and Hobbes are trying to figure out how to kill the Snow Goon. It doesn’t include a snowman, but I include it here because it’s about a snowman and the conversation is very dark and funny. In it, Calvin and Hobbes try to remember how Frosty was killed in the Christmas cartoon Frosty the Snowman. Of course, Frosty didn’t die in that cartoon, it’s just really funny that Calvin’s takeaway from an adorable Christmas special is that Frosty was some kind of a monster which required killing with an icicle.
7
One of the final Calvin and Hobbes comics
Calvin and Hobbes concluded on Dec. 31, 1995 and this comic ran on Dec. 29, making it the third to last Calvin and Hobbes comic ever. It’s clear that Watterson wanted to include one more snowman gag before bringing the comic to an end.
6
A disturbing series
Calvin’s “Snowman House of Horror” might be Watterson’s most famous snowman strip, and another great example of Watterson using the whole strip for one funny visual — or, in this case, five funny visuals.
5
Jump!
This one is disturbing on so many levels. Not only is it a scene depicting snowman suicide, but Calvin’s word bubble makes it clear that the people below want the snowman to jump. Man that’s messed up.
4
Maybe Calvin was watching The Godfather
Poor Susie is terrorized in this comic by a decapitated snowman left on her front step — classic.
3
Calvin sure is creative
Calvin’s creativity here is impressive. Plenty of snowman jokes involve suicide, but the idea of a snowman killing himself with a hot water bottle is especially slow and cruel.
2
Hard to believe Watterson got away with this
This one is crazy dark because of its second-to-last panel fearing a snowman with a noose. It’s equal parts funny and concerning.
1
A peek into Calvin’s psyche
If a hanging snowman isn’t enough of a look into Cabin’s disturbed mind, this comic offers a much deeper examination. In this one, Calvin has made snow-effigies of all of his enemies so that he can watch them melt. The sheer volume of people Calvin hates is incredibly dark, but the very idea that a six-year-old knows what an effigy is and decides to torture them is even darker.
